Thursday, December 10, 2009

Time sucks

Time is moving too fast. But at the same time it's moving too slow. Makes no sense right?
This semester is nearly done. I have a week left. Not even because I have one more class today, and then classes don't meet on Monday and Tuesday next week. So basically I have two more days of classes. Holy crap. I want this semester to end, but at the same time I really REALLY don't want it to. I am not ready to go home. I don't want to at all. I like it here, in fact I love it here, and I'm sad to lose that.

At the same time it's moving slowly.
For those of you who are my facebook friends,(which is probably all of you....lol) On November 21st I decided it was time I moved on from Matt. (course this was the third time THIS semester, but we'll ignore that) Since then, it's been hard. Everyday is a struggle for me. And I hate it. I hate the struggle and the way that I feel most of the time. But at the same time I love it, because it's making me who I am, and each day that I succeed by not talking to him or looking at his web pages is an accomplishment and is bringing me one step closer to finally being over him.  I wish it was easier...mostly because I hate the constant fear I live in. I'm doing good, it's been two weeks, nearly three. But I'm terrified he's going to contact me and that I won't be strong enough to tell him to go away. I hate getting new facebook messages, because I'm constantly scared that it's him. But I'm dealing. I know a lot of people say its bad to count the days, or weeks since something, especially when that something is getting over someone, but I feel like it helps me. Each day that I succeed is me completing a goal. I feel that by keeping track of it pushes me forward and helps me keep going at this.

In other news, I hate winter. I hate snow and cold. The only part of winter I like is Christmas and that's cause, well it's Christmas, and also my birthday.

Now for a secret:

No comments:

Post a Comment